Hey Stupid,
I'd like to introduce you to a feature you'll be seeing a lot on Unintelligent Defense. I'm a degenerate gambler with an addictive personality. I've never been able to walk away from a table and that holds true with online gambling. After losing everything I made on Serra/GSP I, I've switched from betting real money on sports books to making bar bets with female MMA fans. So far I've been a winner and hopefully with my terrible advice, you can too!
The sports books are finally figuring out how to handicap MMA which means there is a great chance to lose some real money but a major opportunity to win some n00dz. Currently the odds for the WEC 51 look like so:
Main Card!
Jose Aldo -650 vs. Manny Gamburyan +450
Jamie Varner -180 vs. Donald Cerrone +150
Miguel Torres -450 vs. Charlie Valencia +350
Chan Sung Jung -355 vs. George Roop +285
Mark Hominick -185 vs. Leonard Garcia +155
Under Card!!!
Tie Quan Zhang -180 vs. Pablo Garza +150
Mike Brown -360 vs. Cole Province +290
Chris Horodecki -160 vs. Ed Ratcliffe +130
Diego Nunes -215 vs. Tyler Toner +175
Antonio Banuelos -345 vs. Chad George +275
Nick Pace -120 vs. Demetrious Johnson -105
My go to bet for this card to yield the greatest boob to beer ratio is Charlie Valencia at +350. For every 1 beer gambled wins you 3 pictures of her chest. Any girl willing to bet pictures of her boobs will have to have some sort of MMA knowledge, but not enough to know that Miguel Torres isn't the fighter he once was. Charlie Valencia will provide a major payout and parlayed with Manny Gamburyan should win you some major action. The stipulations are up to you but 2 beers to get some trim seems worth it to me.
I would never bet on George Roop though, that man is getting his ass kicked on Thursday and you will see losses on your bar tab.
Hope this helped you out.
-The Management
If there is a guy favored as heavy as Jose Aldo, always bet against him.
ReplyDeleteEither way your a winner I guess.
ReplyDeleteQuality break down. A Torres loss is good for all... YOU ARENT FUCKING FUNNY MAN!
Did you just say I'm not funny?
ReplyDeleteIs thisred nate gonna have to ban a bitch?!
Torres=not funny
ReplyDeleteIntoxicated thisredengine=Hilarity
Especially when failed attempts with dirty birds goes down.
who is the Jonathon Snowden of this blog..I need to know who to prematurely hate.
ReplyDeleteDear Shizzle,
ReplyDeleteI am most likely the Jonathan Snowden of the blog.
xoxo
thisredengine
This is shitty advice and if you follow it, you'll die alone in a cold, drafty basement somewhere in the Tri-State area.
ReplyDeleteGod bless you drunken bastards. Onto my blogroll with ye!
ReplyDelete-woomikee
Eff you thisredengine!!!
ReplyDeleteNo, not really, good luck with this, all 4 of you bastards....
I like cerrone +150. manny @ +450 is getting hard to resist, im aware that also is jesus but manny on the ground should be worth a punt right?
ReplyDeleteI don't know how to say this, so I'll just blurt it out. Fuck bloody elbow.
ReplyDeleteWith that said,you got some funny shit. Can I be Snowden? Never mind, I'll be Leland, he's cool.
I'm gonna try and bet some sex favors. Win-win, brother. Win-win