Sunday, October 17, 2010

One Sided Conversations : UFC 120

UFC 120 is in the books for all time zones now (I think) and I would like to ask all of you to sit in a circle with me, pants optional of course, and listen to my post-fight thoughts.

Yoshihiro Akiyama- Your beautiful mansuit is going to start losing it's glow if you don't start winning some fights. Please, I beg you to drop to Welterweight. I'm sure you have enjoyed your 3 FOTN bonuses in as many fights but start fighting smart. Your fight IQ is teetering on stupid.

Michael Bisping - Speaking of teetering on stupid, get off your opponent's back hand please! You were able to fight your style of fight and you won. That is to your credit but you will never rise above your current level if you keep fighting this way. Also, go back to shaving your head. It enhances your douchebaggery and we both know that is your most marketable quality.

Dan Hardy - Shit happens, man. Condit was more technical and accurate with the left hook and you paid the price. You did win me over in this fight. I thoroughly enjoy how much you thoroughly enjoy having Bruce Buffer announce your name. You were clearly disappointed post-fight but you were a classy dude and I dig that. Next time, don't let your opponent knock your great white shark teefas down your throat.

Carlos Condit - Way to step up to the plate. You definitely silenced a hostile crowd and won them over in the end. 2 more wins and I think you got a title shot.

Mike Pyle - Talk about stepping up to the plate. You got a dominant win over John Hathaway who has had a rocket strapped to his ass since his debut. Also, bomb shit props go out to Randy Couture. As soon as he called to you for the level change and the overhand right, you took over and never looked back. Fantastic performance.

Cheick Kongo - You only hit Travis in the balls once so that is pretty shocking. However, Travis Browne must have been wearing shorts made out of women's asses and titties because you could not stop grabbing them! You deserved to lose that fight and if Brock Lesnar loses to Cain Velasquez it would be my pleasure to watch him smash the bejesus out of you.

Travis Browne - Please work on that striking. You were charging forward and winging punches so wildly you looked like Lisa Simpson.

James McSweeney - GET THE FUDGE OUT!

That is all. Thanks for reading this.

1 comment:

  1. I was torn about the Hardy/Condit fight. While I was excited I actually got one pick right, and that it was an exciting win for Condit, I also was won over by Hardy post fight. He has true enthusiasm and the "I got punched in the face" comment was awesome.

    I enjoy your post fight thoughts sans pants.

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